[sinclairfan]

Dramatis Personae:

Jenna--David's 49-year old wife of 22 years, who checks his texts upon waking every morning at 4:45am to do her T'ai Chi.

Kim--David's 46-year old divorced co-worker (different field office), who texted him last night to see how he's doing.  They worked on a project in 2009.

Text conversation between the two blonde ladies:
J>  Why did you text my husband last night asking him what he does "for fun"?

[2 minutes later]
K> Good morning.  I don't believe we've met.  Do I know you?

> Good morning.  I see you're a morning person, too.  I sort of respect that, unlike other properties of you.  I'm Jenna.  Your work-crush's wife.

> Nice to meet you.  He never mentioned your name before.

> May I ask your name? 

> That's fair.  I'm Kim. 

> You're deflecting my question.

> I believe my words to him were self-explanatory.

> I'd stll prefer you explain them.  Kim.

[longer pause than usual between text replies]
> I was making sure he was happy.  Is he happy, Jenna?

> That's a bold question for you to be asking, Kim.  How is his happiness any of your business, Kim?

> When you come across old friends, you don't ask if they're happy, Jenna?

> Not if they're married, I don't.  No, Kim.

> Why not, Jenna?

> Because if they're married, the question carries different meanings.  Sexual meanings. 

> Isn't that part of being happy?  Jenna?

> Are YOU happy?  Kim?

> Since you ask, Jenna:  No, I'm not.  I'm horny , and lonely.  But I expect to change that.  Life's too short.

> I wish you well, Kim.  But leave David out of it.  Ok?

> Or what, Jenna?

> You don't wanna know, Kim.  Do not fuck with me.

> I do want to know.  But ok, whatev's.

> Ok.

To be continued....

[sinclairfan]

Work IM conversation between David and Kim later that day.

K> Delightful wife you've got there, Cowboy.  I always suspected she had a pole up her ass, but I never would have guessed how far up.

D> Oh, no, what happened?

> She didn't tell u?  She and I introduced each other at dawn.  By text.

> No, she didn't mention it.  Isn't that when duels used to happen?  At dawn.

> Funny.  But not funny.  David ... u let her read ur texts???  Do u read hers???

> In theory I'm allowed to.  Been awhile since I have.

> Pffft ... she knows u won't.  She's a bitch ....  AND a pussy.

> Ur ok, right?  She didn't rattle u, did she?

> David David David ... I eat bitches like her for breakfast, ok.  Ok?

> That's what I like to hear, sweetie.

> I know u do.  And thanks for the 'sweetie' .... that's what I like to hear.  :-p

> Mmmm .... tongue.  ;-p

> Have a good day, Cowboy.

> U2 .... sweetie.  <3

> xoxoxo

[sinclairfan]

5am the next morning, text conversation between Kim and Jenna:

J> Morning, Sunshine.

K> Free advice--if you think ur funny, ur not.  'Splains why ur single, if u ask me.

> Free advice back:  bitchy wives get cheated on.

> Is that what happened to u when u were married?

> U don't know jack-shit about me, Jenna. 

> How do u know David didn't share with me?

> Because he's never asked me about my past.  He and I just talk about a future.

> U listen to me you skank tramp:  YOU AND DAVID HAVE NO FUTURE.  Got it??

> What are u gonna do?  Put a chastity belt on him, bitch?

> I don't need to.  Without me he has no money, and no way to make money.

> Major hole in ur plan, honey.  I have my own money.  And I'm ready to share it with the right guy.

> Then MOVE ON to a different guy, Kim.  Do not fuck with me.  Or with David.  It's not worth it.

> Even if David wasn't worth it .... and he is ..... but even if he wasn't, it would be worth it to me to take him just to put you in ur place.  Bitch.

> Recalculate, Kim.  Nothing is worth the hell I'll put u thru if u don't BACK OFF.

> No need to recalculate.  Ur horrible.  Someone needs to show u that.

> And that person is u?  Ha!

> I'm thinking it is.  And maybe I'm funny after all, if I just made u laugh.

> I'm laughing at u, not with u bitch.

> Fuck u.

> Back at u.

To be continued....

[sinclairfan]

5am the next morning, by text

K> Hey, tough girl.

J> That's Sexy Woman to you, but what?

> I find nothing sexy about you at; and the jury is still out on the woman part.

> The ring on my finger says you're deluded.  But what the hell do you want.

> Your husband ... AND ... and to challenge you.  We both have backing and support--how about we tell them to 'Stand Down', and we face each alone.

> I've been facing you alone this whole time, honey.

> I beg to differ--all you do is tell me not to fuck with you, or you'll come at me with some unspoken army.

> Fine .... I'll come at you with nails, elbows, and teeth.  That work better for you.

> Ooooo, teeth .... now THAT's sexy ... kinda.

> So?  Are we doing it?  Facing each other?

> I live alone,  You don't.  Not yet.  I can host.  Need the address?

> I have it already, bitch.

> Tomorrow's Saturday.  You free?

> Saturday night's great for fighting, I heard.  cxnt.

> Let's see if that's true.  Slut.

to be continued.....

[sinclairfan]

Saturday morning, just after 11

Jenna pulls into Kim's driveway; Kim comes outside to greet her as Jenna fumbles with her airline roller board and Road Trip trash--a Mcdonald's bag and paper coffee cup.

K> Well, well.  The challenger is here.  [Kim seriously weighs the pro''s and con's of assaulting Jenna right her in the driveway.]

J> You have our roles seriously reversed, hun.  I'm the champ .... YOU're the challenger.

> Perhaps .... for the marriage .... RING.  But his heart is MINE, sweetie.  [Kim steps threateningly close to Jenna.  Jenna smells better than Kim expected after a moderate-length car-ride.  Even her breath smells more like Tic-Tac's than coffee-breath.]

> I feel bad for you, Kim.  Girl your age should be able to distinguish love from lust.  [Jenna is unable to dispute Kim's raw middle-age beauty and sexual attractiveness.  If her athletic abilities have remained similarly intact, Kim will put up an intense fight tonight.]

> Oh, I can distinguish, sweetie.  I'll take the lust.  Suits me just fine.

> ..... [Jenna closes her SUV's trunk, and steps forward to be nose to nose with Kim]....

> In fact, we can avoid any unnecessary .... messiness .... between us if you just get right back in the nice car of yours, drive back home, and let me and David keep up our [air quotes] 'work collaboration'.  Deal, Jenna?

> I didn't drive all this way to NOT kick your ass..... bitch.

> [Steps back, as the urge to slap her rival and start catfighting prematurely in the driveway has become overwhelming.]  Ahhhh, the 'b'-word.  Well, you called me it to my face, I'll give ya that.  But any woman who has ever done that has paid the [air quotes] 'Kim tax' for doing so.

> Bitch.  Where do I shower and change.

> Follow me to the shower.  And don't worry about changing.  We don't need any clothes for  .... our business.  Agreed, bitch?

> Fine by me.  cxnt.

To be continued.....

[sinclairfan]

While Kim agreed that if ever she was going to have a nude catfight, that Jenna was the bitch to have it against, she was a little disappointed in the shower.  Kim was accustomed to getting in the mood to fight by slipping into her jean cutoff shorts and tank top.  They made her feel totally bad ass.  In theory, she could slip into them after getting into the shower and face Jenna that way--and then sultily remove them to beging her rumble with Jenna.

But jean cutoff shorts don't .... 'slip off'.  You sort of peel them off--and you can't do that gracefully, standing, and without risking pulling a muscle.

Nothing badass about that.

No, instead she would shower, blow dry her blonde air .... and strut out to confront her rival in her birthday suit.

There probably wouldn't be much preliminary trash talk.  Both women would want to begin breaking each others' bones and tearing up each others' flesh.

There would be no inhibitions on Kim's end.  Jenna was a stuck up bitch who had no respect for David.  She'd blown it.  She'd lost her husband thru her bitchy personality.  Not just bad days--every woman has those.

No, Jenna had bad YEARS.  She was beyond redemption.

Plus .... she shoulda got her ass kickdd years ago.  She was getting THAT today .... regardless of where events went after this.

Kim feels a blast of hot shower water.

Jenna musta flushed a toilet, knowing that would happen.

> DIDYA DO THAT ON PURPOSE BITCH?

> NOT SORRY KIM !!!!!!!!!

> [I can't wait to tear up this bitch.]

To be continued.....

[sinclairfan]

As recently as 10 years ago, it would have been unthinkable to Kim to walk around nude in her own house with a guest over.  But a decade of Tinder swiping .... and Tinder dating .... had erased that inhibition from her thoughts and actions.  She was now fully comfortable walking around undressed in front of men .... and certain women.

Certain women .... such as rivals.

Because Kim knew that when in a war, to "Understand thine enemy."  She wanted to know what sort of body she was competing against.  In a few minutes, she would see Jenna nude.  She was confident the comparison would be favorable to herself, The Other Woman.

The Other Woman for now.  Jenna was obviously unbearable over the long haul.

Jenna and David were on the out's.  Kim was simply getting the unstable boulder rolling.

This was gonna be fun.

To be continued....