[herboyfriend]

‘Bavarian Beer Queen’ Johanna Seiler had something bad in store for Californian pop princess Katy Perry. Just after Katy scored a victory while fighting German pop star Lena Meyer Landrut she got challenged by Lena’s fan and ‘local celebrity’ Johanna who, after Katy accepted her challenge, destroyed the princess at the arm wrestling table and in the ring.
Katy was devastated - promising her fans not to leave the country until she can do so celebrating victoriously, she’d finally reached her goal by defeating Lena; but, after losing to Johanna successively she now has a list of three losses to German pop stars compared to only one win.
Katy has to prolong her stay, and invites ’any girl who dares to take her on’ to step into the ring with her.
Not long after her renewed challenge, Melissa Naschenweng, singer and accordion player from Bavaria, steps up to face Katy Perry.  She tells the Californian Gurl that she’ll defeat her in a singing contest as well as in a wrestling match.
Katy takes one look at Melissa and laughs at her. ’Sorry, little girl, I fight only grown up women, hahaha!’
Angered at Katy’s ridicule, the 28 year old blonde slaps her face. Katy staggers backwards, then glares at her new opponent before rushing at her to slap her back. Melissa stumbles to one side, then hisses at Katy, ’Bitch, this fight will be the end of you! I’ll fucking destroy you!’
’Oh, really? You really think you’re ready to stand up to me? Girl, when I’m finished with you you’ll feel like somebody put you through a paper shredder!’

Katy and Melissa soon meet at an open air festival in the Austrian mountains where, before a numerous audience, they engage in a battle of voices, armwrestling, and finally a wrestling match in the ring.


- - - - - - -


KATY PERRY: 33 years, 5’6”

MELISSA NASCHENWENG: 28 years, 5’4”


- - - - - - -



Each of the women has to send two music videos to a jury (before singing live in front of the audience) to prove she’s the better musician and singer:


MELISSA: ’As I’m the younger woman with the better voice and the better music videos it isn’t going to be difficult for the jury to decide! Poor talentless Katy, you’re really just famous for wearing weird things on your boobs, aren’t you?’  ??


https://youtu.be/rOe0mzcmyL4


https://youtu.be/mSOUyb1t4Ew





KATY: ’That deluded upstart will hopefully learn her lesson when the jury compares my pro style, creative videos to her beginner’s amateur products! Where that naive little girl gets the idea from that she could even in the remotest compete with me is beyond me!’


https://youtu.be/tAp9BKosZXs


https://youtu.be/1-pUaogoX5o






Afterwards, Katy and Melissa have to perform for a live audience, with the listeners voting for either one of the ladies as the better singer:



MELISSA: ’Here we go, little Californian princess of embarrassment - this is how a show onstage is done, and how to actually sing to an audience! Sounds better than Katy Perry’s squealing like a cat with her tail caught in a slammed door, doesn’t it? Hahaha!’



https://youtu.be/-8Wg4oFKGLA


https://youtu.be/s2CilUzm8ys





KATY PERRY: ’Oh gawd, Melissa, that’s the best you can do, really? Have you ever seen me with my guitar onstage, and, by the way, you call that singing? You can barely catch your breath on that stage, girl! Watch me when I show you how to do this!’



https://youtu.be/OMOHHEaHH7Y


https://youtu.be/TnotF2Bugs0




KATY and MELISSA have to leave it up to the jury to decide who’s the better looking, sexier lady. They each send in two of their hottest pictures.



KATY: ’Well, if you compare my looks to hers you can see the difference between a little girl like her and an actual real woman like me!’








MELISSA: ’Good gracious me, really? She talks about “real women” looking like a cross between a clown and a prostitute herself? When the jury looks at me they’ll certainly see who’s the classy, really sexy girl here!’’









Katy also wants to prove she’s looking better in a bikini than Melissa - and so, both girls compete for the title of Best Bikini Body:




KATY:







MELISSA:








On the day of their competition and fight, both women feel confident about a boob fight in which each contestant will try to squeeze and flatten her rival’s breasts with her own.


MELISSA: ’These girls are completely capable of squashing Katy Perry’s famous boobies to a pulp! I’m looking forward to seeing her face while I make pancakes of her tits!’





KATY: ’Shouldn’t she wait with the boob fighting until she actually grows a pair of them? I’ll squash those pimples without effort! And she brags about those zits? That shows how deluded the poor girl is!’









Below: KATY PERRY

















Below: MELISSA NASCHENWENG















BELOW: Melissa Naschenweng wearing her outfit for the fight in the ring. Katy Perry claims she’ll rip her top and pants to shreds.






BELOW: Katy Perry in her outfit for the ring in which she’ll fight Melissa Naschenweng. Melissa told the press she’ll pull Katy’s boxing trunks down ’down to her ankles before spanking her’.

[herboyfriend]

I opened this poll hours before I read the news about Nicki Minaj and Cardi B; somebody who hasn’t got one open really needs to start one about those two!