Madison Iseman vs Yara Shahidi

Yara let out a long moan as she stumbled away, eyes suddenly glazed. She had been dominating the fight almost from the very start, but then in a total fluke, Madison flailed her arms, and her elbow smashed into her opponent's right temple, severely stunning her. Madison didn't care if it was just sheer dumb luck on her part, she was determined to make the most of it. It had been humiliating to the blonde that her adversary had been so clearly out-wrestling her. Madison Iseman takes second to no woman, least of all this bronzed bitch!
She kept the pressure up on Shahidi, starting with a palm blow to the jaw that further rattled the raven-haired beauty's senses. Deciding to play with her rival as a cat does with a mouse, Madison stepped behind Yara and placed the heels of her palms to her victim's temples, then executed a skull crusher. Shahidi whined in pain as the pressure slowed the blood flow to her brain, and she slowly sank to her knees in a stupor. Beaming a smugly self-confident smile, Iseman released her hold and stepped over to her kneeling foe's side; she next snapped a kick, the ball of her foot smashing into the side of Yara's face. Then she unleashed another, and then a third, which was the one that sent the sepia-skinned battler sprawling to the floor in a daze.
Standing over her fallen opponent, hands on her hips, the blonde smirked and, raising her right leg, began to stomp her heel down on Yara's forehead. The pounding robbed the brunette of what scant awareness she had left, and she lay there groaning in semi-consciousness. "Let's go for the show-stopper finisher, dear" Madison cooed; she then executed an impressive leg splits, her body dropping down until her crotch settled down over the hapless Shahidi's face, executing a humiliating face sit knockout. It was a stunning example of how fate could turn the fortunes of war around in an instant. Madison didn't care if she lucked into this win...it was her triumph, and she reveled in it!
Amanda Seyfried vs Michelle Trachtenberg: Three Sides to Every Story

It was a classic Rashomon moment, with no two tellings of the tale quite matching the other.
First, Amanda's version: "I don't mean to sound vain, but I was brilliant that night. I was at my total peak physically and mentally. Trachtenberg never stood a chance! I dominated her right from the start, and made her my little bitch. I could have finished her off in a few minutes, but I let the match go on, because all of those wonderfully powerful people were there to see a fight, and I didn't want to disappoint them. But really, she was pathetic. I mean, she tried her best, but on her best day she's not even close to me on my worst. I was just laughing at her feeble attempts to fight back. She was blubbering like a little baby, her bottom lip pouting out as I humiliated her again and again. Finally I took pity on the dumb sow and decided to put her out of her misery. I locked my headscissors around her empty skull, and when I start to squeeze, believe me, nobody
ever escapes! I can crack a coconut with these thighs. Anyway, she was screaming her submission, but I refused to accept it. She was just a few seconds away from passing out, when suddenly the ombudsman jumps in and declares the match a draw! What the fuck is that all about?!? I had her totally beat, and he had to save her ass! I know why...they've created the fiction that Trachtenberg is a great fighter, and my defeating her would shatter that myth. It's all a conspiracy to deny me my rightful glory! Well, they can't protect her forever, and someday...soon, I hope...I'll finish that bitch off once and for all!"
Next, Michelle was solicited for her take on the event: "I hate to say it, but Amanda is probably my toughest opponent. All of our fights are brutal. But she also makes me step up my game, and I think some of my best matches have been against her. Anyway, she was really good that night, but I was better. The only way she could get any advantage was to cheat. I came out of there with all kinds of scratches and bite marks from that mangy bitch! But I still out-wrestled her. I had a bunch of chances to end the match, but I knew just how I wanted to win, so I bided my time until I had the chance. Seyfried is always bragging around her legs and how powerful her scissors is. Well, she knows very well that my scissors is twice as lethal as hers, and she does whatever she can to avoid being caught between my thighs. But finally she couldn't escape, and I clamped my scissors around her head, locked my ankles, and from that moment on I knew it was just a matter of time before she either tapped out or passed out. I was hoping her pride wouldn't let her submit, because I would have loved to have KO'd her. Anyway, I could feel the eyes of all of the spectators riveted on me as I utterly destroyed her. But then all of a sudden, the ombudsman tells me to break the hold, because the match was a draw! I was so shocked I didn't respond, and he had to threaten me with suspension if I didn't let her go. Well, I may have been robbed of the official victory, but everyone who was there knows full well that I won that fight! Just as I'll beat Seyfried again the next time we meet, and every other time after that."
Perhaps the only person who could reconcile these two very diametrically opposite viewpoints is the most controversial member of this trio, the match's ombudsman: "I've been hosting celebrity catfights in my Laguna Beach home for years, and without a doubt the Trachtenberg/Seyfried matches have been among the most thrilling. I've never seen such two perfectly matched rivals. And they most definitely did not disappoint this time. When one would make some magnificent move, the other could counter brilliantly. It was like watching a catfighting seminar! But because they're so evenly matched, the fight was a veritable stalemate from the opening moments, with neither beauty able to hold control of the action for very long before her opponent turned the tide. They battled this way almost for a full hour, long past their limits of endurance, fueled I guess by the hatred they share for each other, and it was obvious to us all that the only way this was probably going to end was with one just passing out from sheer exhaustion. Anyway, I'm not quite sure how it happened, but they were grappling on the floor, rolling back and forth, just a tangle of arms and legs, and then suddenly they snared each other in headscissors simultaneously! Not to sound crass, but it was the most tantalizing '69' I've ever seen, as two sets of the most perfect legs in Hollywood locked down on each other. They were each whimpering in pain and growling in determination in equal measures, the muscles of their legs tight like steel cords, the sweat glistening off of their bodies. I'm sure every one of us in the audience held out breath in suspense, wondering who would emerge the winner from this incredible duel. And then it happened...they both gave out loud, languid sighs and their bodies suddenly went limp. They had knocked each other out at the same time! I had no choice but to declare the match a draw."