[Sandman13]

Kaley Cuoco was laughing and joking with the gaggle of reporters outside the premier of a new movie.  One the reporters asked her what the best thing about being Kaley was.
"Oh, just to be young and strong and successful - not an old washed up wannabe like, oh, I dunno - Jaime Pressly or someone!" she replied with a giggle. But wouldn't you know it - doing the red carpet stroll right behind her was Jaime herself! The former "My Name Is Earl" star heard the cruel remark and naturally took offense.
So for the next five minute a group of paparazzi were treated to the sight of Kaley Cuoco getting her ass handed to her by another blonde 20 years older but one who was obviously much, much tougher.
Kaley was punched, kicked, twisted, thrown, kneed and flipped until she was a sobbing wreck, stripped to her panties and bawling helplessly. "Please, please - Jaime!" she wailed. "Stop! I'm sorry - I take it all back! I'm the loser - me! Just stop kicking my ass, PLEASE!!"
Jaime pulled the quivering blonde starlet to her feet and stuck a finger right in front of her face. "Let this be a lesson, you little strumpet! Young and strong doesn't mean tough - you're nothing but a wimp with a big mouth. Now stand up and take what's coming to ya!"
She grabbed a big handful of Kaley's thick hair in her left hand and, winding up good, landed two hard rights to the ingénue's jaw. Kaley's big blue eyes rolled back in her head, crossed once or twice and then clicked shut. Jaimie released her hold and Kaley flopped to the sidewalk like a puppet with cut strings.
All the LA papers the next day had Jaimie on the front page, striking a muscle pose with a big grin while in the background lay poor Kaley face down and her fine ass in the air.

[Chotch87]

Poor Selena needs a fight where she wins.

[al2468]

Miley was waiting for years to get her hands on Ashley. "I hate the bitch, I want her in a catfight to the finish, one woman walks away," said Miley.  " If the ugly slut wants to fight I'll take her on and send her to the hospital, " replied Ashley.  The crowd was in an uproar as the girls made their entrance.  Ashley in black, Miley in pink. The ladies went right after each other determined to strip their opponent. As they rolled around the floor, each girl had accomplished their objective.  Now completely nude,  the fighters grabbed and tore at their opponents breasts and crotch. Moans, grunts, and screams echoed thru the room as the girls tore into each other, both intent on hurting the other.  " I said I'll put you in the hospital bitch" as Ashley got on top of Miley and went crazy with punch after punch to Miley's face and head. Miley was unable to defend herself from the barrage of blows and was bleeding from the nose and mouth, but Tisdale would not stop.  She grabbed Miley's head and continually banged it off the floor until the crying Miley was unconscious.  Ashley walked away to the cheers of the crowd, Miley went to the hospital. 

[al2468]

The celebrity fight promoter was looking for a fight between mature woman (in their 40's ), who were still knockouts with an international flair.  He decided on the German Heidi, age 42- 5 foot 10 vs the Columbian Sophia age 43- 5 foot 8.  He approached the two beauties with the offer.  A private apartment catfight in front of 20 spectators, winner take all for a cash prize of $1 million.  Both woman had been in fights before and each quickly excepted the invitation to do battle. The promoter explained that the woman would be bound together at the waist with a 5 foot rope and they will fight until one fighter was knocked out.  No submissions, pins or tapping out.  The bound together fighters, both dressed in black, had battled for 10 minutes in a vicious back and forth battle, ripping each others clothes off, pulling each others hair out and mauling each others tits. The tiring fighters each had handfuls of their opponents hair as they rolled around the floor grunting and exchanging ethnic insults. Their glistening sweat covered bodies made it difficult for either women to maintain control over her opponent. 5 more minutes into the fight it looked like this could end in a draw as neither girl could gain an advantage.  The promoter separated the girls much to boos from the spectators. The crowd wanted a fight to the finish, a knockout, as was advertised. The girls were asked if they would finish the fight bare knuckles style, no wrestling, pulling hair etc.,but a bare knuckles fist fight until one fighter was knocked out.  Sophia and Heidi stood toe to toe and began to exchange punches. Heidi proved to be the better bare knuckles boxing as she landed stunning blows to Sophia's head and body. The staggering Sophia was helpless as Heidi grabbed her, pushed her into a corner, and unleashed blow after blow until the defeated Sophia slithered down the wall to the floor bleeding and unconscious. Heidi kicked her for good measure, raised her arms in victory and paraded around the room to the cheers of the crowd.

[al2468]

The showbiz- modeling world waited in anticipation for the big night. It was finally arranged and set up.  America's sweetheart Maureen McCormick(aka-Marsha Brady) vs supermodel Christie Brinkley in Las Vegas in a private penthouse.  Christie was quickly established as the 8-1 favorite in the boxing match till a knockout. The fighters entered the room, both in one piece bathing suits, as the invited crowd cheered and yelled encouragement to their favorite.  Most "experts" believed that Christie would knockout Maureen within 3 rounds. Christie looked very confident and cocky as she struck some seductive poses for the crowd. "I'm going to fuck you up big time sweetheart", said Christie." Will see bitch, replied McCormick. You could see the hate between the two as they came to the center ,pushed their tits against each other and had an intense stare down.  As round one began the over confident Christy danced around taunting Maureen. Maureen shocked everyone as she landed a roundhouse right that catches Brinkley and sends her to her knees.  Christy rose at the count of 8 the cockiness gone. This was going to be a fight.  The girls fought hard for 6 rounds, each landing some good shots, but neither fighter able to establish clear dominance.  As the fighters waited for round 7, Christie rose, threw down her gloves, took off her bathing suit and said, "Come on bitch, lets finish it nude, anything goes."  Maureen , at first a bit surprised, smiled and did the same.  They locked up in the center grasping each others wrists struggling for control.  Maureen forced Christy to her knees, grabbed her by the hair and flung her to the carpet. Maureen was on top of the surprised, struggling Christie like a cat, one hand ripping her hair, the other mauling her breasts. Maureen, sensing victory applied a devastating choke hold to Brinkley.  Christie was in big trouble as she struggled to break the hold. Maureen just applied more pressure as the fight was slowly going out of Christie.  "Finish her off, Maureen", the crowd yelled. Chants of MAUREEN_ MAUREEN- filled the room. McCormick landed two big punches to Christie's face knocking her out.   Christie was out cold. The crowd applauded the victor Maureen as she raised her arms and struck a victory pose.

[Jackflash Jump]

Blondes vs Brunettes

It was a tantalizing match concept:  three blondes versus three brunettes in a three-on-three brawl.  Adding to the mystique was the fact that the sextet of combatants would be drawn from a large pool of wrestlers, and not even the fighters themselves would know if they were chosen, and who their partners and opponents would be, until just several hours before the scheduled match time.

Such secrecy managed to keep most people in the dark about the details, but Hayden Panettiere is not most people.  Using her feminine wiles, she not only ensured that she would be one of the chosen blondes, but she also learned the identities of the other two flaxen haired battlers, as well as their darker-maned rivals, several days in advance.  They would be...

TEAM BLONDE:  Hayden Panettiere, Brittany Snow & Abigail Breslin



...versus...

TEAM BRUNETTE:  Vanessa Hudgens, Michelle Trachtenberg & Ariel Winter



Obviously, the organizers were opting to match up known arch-rivals, which suited Hayden just fine.  After all, she's not one to pass up a chance to kick that bitch Vanessa's ass.  And with the singular knowledge of who the other five women will be, she held a valuable ace card that could tilt the contest in the blondes' favor.  To ensure this, Panettiere secretly contacted Snow and Breslin, and for the two days prior to the match, they trained intensely together, working out moves and maneuvers which would allow them to function as a team, while their adversaries could only hope to fight as individuals.

The hour of the match finally arrived, and as the two teams entered the mansion's vast living room from bedrooms on opposite sides, the brunettes were surprised and pleased to see who their opponents would be, while the blondes seemed utterly unsurprised, and were positively aglow with self-confidence.  That aplomb proved entirely well-placed, as Team Blonde took early control of the battle, the golden maned trio deftly trading off with opponents, applying double and triple-team tactics, and otherwise dominating the brunettes, who found themselves bewildered by how effectively their opposite numbers functioned together, almost like a well-oiled fighting machine.

Ultimately, despite valiant efforts to stave off defeat, Vanessa, Michelle and Ariel fell to the inevitable.  Adding insult to injury, their rivals finished them off with the signature moves of the brunettes themselves:  Brittany settled her butt down upon Trachtenberg's face, Abigail pressed her breasts down across the sweaty face of Winter, and Hayden buried Hudgens's mouth and nose under her crotch in a front facesit.  Trapped, the bruised and battered brunettes were helpless as they were driven into unconsciousness.

When they awoke, they discovered a stipulation to the match that Panettiere had surreptitiously slipped into the fine print of the contract, and which the losers were now bound to obey:  they had to go blonde for thirty full days, displaying to the world that blondes are better than brunettes!

[DogWithABone]

Blondes vs Brunettes


TEAM BLONDE:  Hayden Panettiere, Brittany Snow & Abigail Breslin

Did Hayden Pants buy some tits or did they just balloon after childbirth?

[Jackflash Jump]

She seemed to get quite busty after having her baby, so I'm going with them being natural.

Blondes vs Brunettes


TEAM BLONDE:  Hayden Panettiere, Brittany Snow & Abigail Breslin

Did Hayden Pants buy some tits or did they just balloon after childbirth?

[al2468]

The two blondes were in competition all night. It was fairly obvious to everyone in the swanky club that Cassie and Emily had their eye on the same man.  "Get lost bitch, he's going home with me," said Cassie. "Not without a fight skank", replied Emily. With those remarks the two drunk girls kicked off their shoes and grabbed each others hair. The shouts of CATFIGHT CATFIGHT echoed through the room as the crowd formed a tight circle around the two blondes now rolling around the floor.  It wasn't long until both girls had ripped their opponents dress down to the waist. The girls were screaming and cussing as they continued to maul each other.  Emily got on top of Cassie and began to smother her with her big tits. Cassie tried to break free , but Emily remained on top and now started to chock Cassie with two hands around her throat.  "Stop, Stop, you win", said Cassie.  Emily finished her off with two punches to Cassie's stomach.  Emily walked out with the man, Cassie remained on the floor crying.

[Xtra164]

lily collins, in true jobber form, posted this great pic on her instagram recently



so here's a very short and quick story of poor Lily getting squashed yet again

Lily Collins vs. Suki Waterhouse

Collins had opened her big mouth yet again, this time in the park on a beautiful day instead of inside a wrestling ring surrounded by a cheering audience. Well she was still surrounded by a cheering audience today, albeit a significantly smaller group of onlookers, but they were cheering for the same reason: watching Lily's snotty ass getting kicked. This time it was at the hands of Suki Waterhouse the fellow United Kingdom chick who was relaxing on a towel with her older boy toy Bradley Cooper. That was until Collins strolled by and, after making a snide comment about the age difference between the couple, Suki decided to give her boyfriend and the other park visitors an impromptu squash job.

It only took one punch to the jaw for Suki to knock Collins out on the ground almost out cold. Suki would follow that up by scooping the groggy Collins over her shoulders bending her backwards in a wicked backbreaker hold. Lily squealed and cried as her petite fragile body was contorted further backwards as Suki confidently paraded around the park with her new prey like a victorious tiger that just caught a deer flashing a sexy smile to her boo Bradley who was trying to hide his massive boner he was getting while watching his girl lay the smackdown on that mouthy brat Lily. Suki decided to have some more fun when she stopped in front of a group of younger boys with wrestling shirts on watching with amazement. "Hey guys!" Suki greeted with energy as Lily pathetically whimpered while still being bent backward over her shoulders. "Want me to demonstrate a wrestling move for all you?? Pick any move you want I'll do it right now!" The kids eyes beamed with excitement as they started to frantically yell out wrestling moves they wanted. Lily began tearing up and pleading with Suki to let her go, apologizing frantically and begging to at least not beat her down in front of a group of little kids, but Suki was having none of it as she heard one boy call out a move that really stood out to her.

Not wanting something too sexually explicit or violently brutal, she was at a park after all with kids present and watching, she decided to go with a rather embarrassing yet effective knockout move. After crudely tossing Collins down on her stomach before gripping her hair pulling the sluggish Lily back to her feet before she could even massage her aching back for a second. After a quick punch to the stomach bending Lily over, Suki wrapped her arm around Collins' neck. Smiling at the kids while securing Collins, even reaching over to Lily's thrusting out butt giving one of her cheeks a playful slap and gripping the waistband of her short shorts giving her a moderate wedgie, the tiny fireball Suki jumped up with Lily's head still locked in her armpit and swooped down diving her body backwards on the ground executing a perfect DDT that hit with such tightness and impact that it caused Collins to flop completely over on her back spread eagled and knocked out once again in classic jobber fashion.

The kids oohed and aahhed in approval as Suki, adding some insult to injury, decided to cap things off by going over to the flattened Collins and exclaiming to the kids still watching "And this is how you pin somebody!" with glee before laying across Lily's spread out body, reaching down for one of her skinny legs and yanking it as far up and back as possible for a classic leg hook pin. Suki kept the leg hooked while putting her own leg around and over Lily's other leg which remained flat on the ground as she posed atop of her easily conquered opponent in a more sensual fashion. Lily's short shorts hid little as is but were even more revealing with her held leg high and back and her thighs and crotch spread for the whole park to see as Bradley Cooper did the honors of very slowly counting to 3 declaring Suki the undisputed winner of this spontaneous little match in the park. Suki jumped back up to her feet, snatched Lily's phone which she dropped after the punch to her jaw earlier, and seeing that Collins was still logged into her Instagram snapped a picture of the knockout Lily before tossing the phone back on and the ground and prancing away with Bradley.

[Jackflash Jump]

FLASHBACK 1979:  Jayne Kennedy vs Cheryl Tiegs



Jayne's squeals of pain filled the penthouse, drawing a smug smirk to Cheryl's lips.  After a long and grueling catfight between the two statuesque beauties, the blonde had taken control of the match.  However, rather than try to force her rival to submit, Tiegs had been indulging in tormenting and humbling Kennedy, seeking to humiliate her before defeating her.  To that end, Cheryl had Jayne's right arm jacked up behind her back in a hammerlock, while with her other hand she grasped the sepia-skinned beauty's bikini panties and jerked them up, giving the brunette a vicious wedgie, forcing her up on her tip toes as Tiegs arrogantly forced her to stumble around the room, as if they were a huntress showing off her trophy.  Jayne's supporters in the audience had never seen their heroine so helpless, and feared she was on the verge of quitting, as much out of embarrassment as pain.

But submission was the last thing on Kennedy's mind.  Instead, she was waiting for her moment to strike, and she suddenly did with cobra speed, throwing her left elbow back, and smashing Cheryl in the jaw.  Instantly stunned, the blonde released her handholds and staggered backward, shaking her head to clear it.  Whirling around, the brunette launched a kick into her opponent's toned belly, doubling Tiegs over with a whoosh of air from her lungs.  Grabbing her adversary by her flaxen mane, Janye threw her down, slamming Tiegs face-first into the plush carpeting.  Moving swiftly, Kennedy sat on her opponent's back and pulled the blonde's left leg back in a Half-Boston Crab.  With her free hand, she reached behind her and grabbed Tiegs by her golden hair, yanking her head back.  Cheryl screamed a electric pain coursed up and down her lithe body.  Jayne pulled harder on both ends, drawing more howls of agonized protest from her victim.

Finally, unable to withstand the agony any longer, Cheryl rasped out her surrender.  But Jayne wasn't done with her yet.  "So, you like playing with your victims, huh?" the brunette sneered.  "Like humiliating them?  Well, let's see how you like a taste of your own medicine."  Ignoring Cheryl's protests, Jayne pulled her exhausted adversary's body up and draped Cheryl's belly over Kennedy's knee.  The brunette then tugged down the blonde's bikini briefs, exposing her bare butt, which Jayne them proceeded to vigorously spank.  Tiegs yowled and sobbed, tears rolling down her face, as her rear end quickly began to glow red from the stinging slaps.  Jayne beamed a smile as the audience cheered and laughed as the blonde's comeuppance.

[Sandman13]

Another blast from the past by Jackflash! I love both Jayne and Cheryl. They were around before the days of the internet or I think they'd have been used much more in celebrity matchups.

[al2468]

agree - love the retro stuff- Cherly Tiegs v Suzanne Summers would be an excellent matchup

[DonR04]

Kate Beckinsale vs Cameron Diaz

Okay, let me give it a try. Since English is not my first language, forgive me not being even close to the level of the writing skills of our great contributors here. So, here goes:

Kate stretched out her beautiful, strong legs, locked her ankles even tighter, and continued to crush Cameron’s ribcage. It was pure agony for Ms. Diaz, as Kate was increasing pressure with her sexy pythons.

Charlize Theron, who was the referee of this fight, knelt down on the mat, and looked very close into Cameron’s face.

“Do you wanna give, Cameron?”

No answer came from Ms. Diaz, who was moaning and writhing in agony, as Kate was destroying her body between her strong legs.

“Oh, she will give, don’t worry.”, Kate said, with a smirk on her face. “Unless of course she wants her ribs broken…or she passes out from the pain.”

“I think she is almost out. Ease up the scissors a little, Kate. Give her a chance to breathe some. Maybe she’ll come to her senses and submit.”

“All right. I’m not really squeezing that hard to begin with. If I wanted to squeeze real tight, her ribcage would have been history by now.”

Kate released the pressure, and a sigh of relief came from Cameron’s mouth.

“Cameron, do you want to give now? Kate’s got you. She can break your ribs if she wants to. Say the word and it will be over.”, Charlize asked again for Cameron’s submission.

Still no answer from the beaten woman. She was whimpering in pain, lying between her tormentor’s legs.

“I think she needs a little more convincing. Don’t you think, Charlize?”

Kate’s strong legs started squeezing again. Cameron’s whole body was convulsing, while she was screaming in agony, her hands desperately clawing and scratching on the mat.

“Ask her again, Charlize! Ask her if she gives now! Do I really have to crack her ribs?”

“Let her go, Kate! She’s out!”, luckily for Ms. Diaz, Charlize realized that she was out cold.

Cameron was knocked out by Kate’s leg power. Not too often one can witness a knockout in a body scissors hold, but with the power of Mrs. Beckinsale’s thighs, that was no surprise. Kate gave her one more squeeze, and then unlocked her deadly hold. She planted her foot on Cameron’s face, waiting for her beaten rival to wake up.

[Jackflash Jump]

Ava Sambora vs Bella Thorne



"Seriously?" Bella sneered at the onlookers.  "You thought this little bitch would be a match for me?"

The redhead was being disingenuous.  Although she had Ava at her mercy now, following a relentless and ruthless assault, the blonde rookie had come perilously close to beating Thorne.  Crumpled in a heap on the penthouse carpet, long blonde hair tangled and hanging over her face as she panted for breath, Sambora angrily gasped, "You...cheated...!"  "Well, yeah," Bella scoffed.  She thought she had been perfectly clever to fake having passed out from the blonde's admittedly lethal full nelson.  This being her first match, Ava lacked the experience to know not to let her guard down, but she did, and that's when the redhead sprang back to life, slamming a vicious punch squarely into the triangle of fabric covering the rookie's groin.  From that point on, Sambora was a rag doll in the hands of her opponent, who proceeded to twist, yank and bend as much of the blonde's lithe body as she could.  To her credit, Ava refused to submit, no matter how great the pain.

Now however, Thorne intends to add insult to the injury.  Dropping to one knee, she pulls Ava's body over her outstretched knee, draping her belly across it.  She then begins to administer a spanking, the palm of her hand slapping Sambora's thong-covered butt...SMACK!  SMACK!  SMACK!...again and again.  Ava squeals, tears welling in her eyes as the pale alabaster skin of her rear end glows red from the beating.  Bella smiles broadly, a cruel glint in her eye as she batters her hapless adversary and makes plain her dominance.  Still, Ava's pride refuses to let her surrender, although all hope of escaping are for naught.

Finally, the host stands up and states the obvious.  "That's enough, Bella...she's finished."  Thorne impishly gives one more spank, which cracks loudly through the room, before standing up, sending Sambora rolling off of her knee and crashing to the floor with a moan.  Placing a foot upon her fallen foe's hip, Bella strikes a contemptuous victory pose.  But the sentiment among the spectators is that, this win aside, Thorne may have just made a very dangerous enemy tonight.