I really just want to lie there. Maybe I want to throw a tantrum, but I can't. When Joanie rolls me to my back, the only resistance is out of pain and fear. But I am too weak to resist. The big woman puts me on my back and covers me with her thick, curvy body and I am going nowhere. She waits and gives the first count, then waits again before giving the second. Some might think she's toying with me but I don't get that sense - she's just giving me every opportunity and being fair. But my opportunities have all been erased and after her second pause, I whisper "threee . . ." basically submitting to the pin. And yes, she could continue to count for a while, but this one is over. I lost to the better wrestler and learned from it. The painful truth - I need to get tougher - a lot tougher. I am getting in better shape, I feel strong, I think my skills are sound - but it's obvious I need to be able to come back after absorbing some punishment and in this match, I was not able to do so. Congratulations Joanie, but this rivalry has not been settled!